a new venture {sometimes}

so.
what's up?
sorry, i don't really know how to start this. i've nothing witty and enticing to say.
{sometimes} i can struggle to be vulnerable...
i think this is because i used to allow myself to be vulnerable to the extreme.
and there needs to be {balance}.
this is going to be a little experiment that i will run via my blog.
i don't really know how many people read this, but i figured it's going to be good for me, even if {no one} ever reads it.
i'm going to try my darnedest to post {once a week}
a new {sometimes} that will reveal something about me that you may not have know.
feel free to comment.
or not.

here goes.

{sometimes} i need to remember that it's ok to let out my emotions.
again, in my past, along with being TOO vulnerable with people...well with the wrong people maybe, i used to be {freakishly} emotional. really i would let my emotions rule me.
i would cry at the drop of a hat.
i would let how i was {feeling} drive the actions i would take.
i would emotionally wrap my heart around a person *ahem* boy and then get hurt when it didn't work out.

so i stopped being so emotional.
for a {long} time casey was the only person really would could elicit tears.
ahhh....the early days of marriage.
i think i became so set on not letting my emotions rule me, that i forgot that it's {ok} to cry.
it's ok.
the exception to this was when i was preggers and {ridiculously} hormonal.
once i cried over cantelope.
seriously.

so i'm learning that {sometimes} it's ok to feel emotional.
when i watch that touching video about a family getting to take their adoptive baby daughter home for the first time or when i think of the incredible blessings that the Lord has heaped upon casey's business or when i think of my sister, sam, and how our friendship has grown and blossomed over the years, and i feel the tears well up, i don't have to staunch them at the edges of my eyelids. i can allow them to spill over and run down my cheeks.
i want my daughters to see the beauty of being feminine, of feeling compassion for others, of having a tender heart.
and one way to show them that is to {sometimes} show them my tears.